Sunday, June 22, 2008

All Clear?

Been laying low the last few days, keeping my nose in spreadsheets, being very intimate with Excel.

Stalker activity has died down, so I can breathe freely again.

Every now and again, I send the Universe a plaintive request for Viggo, but for the most part, my energies have been almost completely focused on work.

I've finalized the terms and general scope of my upcoming consulting project. It rather worries me that the company is not able to scope the project with the kind of minute attention to detail that I prefer, but I suppose that's exactly why they hired me, and it is my sweet spot, after all. So I will just do my thing and ask for forgiveness rather than permission. I do anticipate one area of potential difficulty however. The primary value I bring to the table is negotiating and interacting directly with potential clients. And this is the precise part of the job which has been reserved for the CEO himself. I have to resign myself to getting that critical customer information second-hand. Since I have enormous trust issues, I don't like it. The questions that are asked during a negotiation are rarely in line with the answers that are actually sought. The objections raised usually share very little likeness to the actual objections. And without all the contextual data points that are only available in a face-to-face meeting, how am I going to be able to fully trust any second-hand debriefing? And besides, I've found that, as a general rule, people are far more willing to divulge surprisingly candid information to a small, non-intimidating Asian woman than they might be to someone they perceive as their peer.

I spent Friday morning with a few of my part-time employees for my other project, and it occurred to me, with a great deal of amusement, that all of them are attractive young women: one a red-head, another a blonde, and the third, Asian.

So IC and I have been bickering about which one of us is Charlie and which, Bosley.

Maybe we will have to hire a Bosley so that IC and I can just get mani/pedi's all day long and manage our team jointly over the phone?

But what's really on my mind is that I will FINALLY have a "date" that is worth anticipating! Gorgeous Hunk O' Man (JF) is in town tomorrow night and I will take him to my favorite neighborhood bar/restaurant to reassure them that I don't spend ALL my social time with creepy men I've found online.

I have already put aside my most expensive slutty outfit (in this case, an Hermes scarf-like thing that is minimally draped over only the most-necessary-to-cover parts of my torso) and made a salon appointment to beautify myself in readiness. Gay men are SO much more particular than the straight variety. Of course, I will consider at a later date what it says about my life that only JF warrants such preparation.

Off now, to shimmy happily away at boozy brunch with the girls.


Bartleby said...

Tip: make sure to act as if your $3,000 Hermes scarf is from Mango or a flea market. Makes all the difference.

C-Belle said...

Of course, darling.

The "this old thing?" 'tude.

MrsCooper said...

I don't understand. Please enlighten me.

C-Belle said...

Mrs. C - what should I explain? Or does Bartley need to do the explaining?

I'll take a guess:

"'tude" was my shorthand for attitude...

Does that help?

MrsCooper said...

Yes. Tnx

Enjoy the evening!

Bartleby said...

No, no, no... The Asian way is (ironically) similar to the black way - basically, leave the price tag on. Ok, that usually means just show the label or whatever. The Euro way is to act as if your $10,000 worth of clothes is a sweaty gym outfit, because you are too fascinating a person - oh, and incidentally, too rich - to notice what label you just washed with a lass of Cotes du Rhone. After all, what is any of that compared to... moi? The American way - always buy mail order and skip liquids that might stain.

C-Belle said...

Huh. Interesting...

Let me dissect my own behavior:

1. I pretty much always buy shit online. I hate shopping in person

2. I don't proactively identify which designer I am wearing, but will confess when asked

3. I treat everything with the same disregard with which I treat my yoga clothes

4. I stick with white wine and vokda

5. I remove labels

Bartleby said...


C-Belle said...