Ex-Husbands

Gorgeous Hunk O' Man (JF) has been referring to me as his favorite ex-wife for over a decade now. And often, when he leaves me voicemail messages, he identifies himself as my ex-husband. This was not so confusing before I acquired an actual ex-husband.

I checked my voicemail on a noisy street the other day and heard this: "It's your ex-husband. The goddamn lawyers tell me you want more money. What the f*ck!?!"

I was taken aback.

My thoughts, in order:

1. OMG, my lawyer is SO stupid, that's not what I was saying AT ALL.
2. Oh wait. I don't have a lawyer.
3. I can ask for more money?
4. Oh wait, it's THAT ex-husband! *giggle*