Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Use It Or Lose It

I have received scoldings lately from a number of different friends.

The message has been consistent, however: "Have sex."

Funny how that message has evolved over time. A year ago, I was under strict orders NOT to have sex without prior Board approval. Apparently, it was a decision I was not allowed to make on my own.

Now my friends, in the deathless words of a Nike advert, are yelling at me to "just do it."

I think it's because I've been talking about cats too much.

But in my defense, I've been BUSY. I schedule time to pee once a day, for chrisssake's.

IC and I took a quick break from our work day (during which I pee'd) and she followed me around before finally standing outside the bathroom door, earnestly telling me that it is "ok to be a ho-bag."

*sigh*

So, to take the pressure off, I have informed everyone that I will break the fast in December. (November is just entirely too busy). MM's comment: "December?!? What about TUESDAY?"

I even set a date. December 7th. It's on my calendar. With whom, you ask? No clue. I feel like one of those women who plan their weddings to the nth degree while leaving the name and face of the groom as a "TBD."

IC then engaged in her favorite activity - she made a list. I heard her muttering under her breath as she wrote in a name and then immediately crossed it out: "No. He's just not worth your vagina."

And it's for that last quote that I had to write this post. Of course now I'm wondering what kind of google traffic I'm going to get on my blog. I suspect people who stumble upon my blog while looking for porn will be sorely disappointed.

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